Breaking Free from Societal Expectations and Living Authentically
“Man is born free, and everywhere he is in chains.”
— Jean-Jacques Rousseau
The Chains of Society and Conformism
As a Social creature and an Individual Soul, you are likely to face the conflict between the expectations of others about you, and your own authentic self.
The tug of war between social expectations and the call of the Individual Soul.
In a world that often prioritizes conformity, your authenticity is in danger if you cannot hear the valuable whispers and oracles of your individuality.
In this war between conformity and authenticity, How does one truly find oneself, and break free?
Society on the one hand provides a structure and a sense of belongingness in our lives, on the other hand, it imposes, expectations with its unwritten rules and ideas of how we should be that we must fit in.
These expectations tell us what we “should” or “shouldn’t” do with our lives, which is actually uniquely ours to design and live.
It unconsciously shapes our behaviours, decisions, and choices.
We find ourselves conforming for the sake of a sense of security and belongingness it projects.
But it is a trap.
These chains manifest as social-cultural norms and standards and the roles we are expected to play in our lives according to our age, gender, and background.
Which are constantly and generationally perpetuated by certain types of media, religion, traditional authoritative figures, cultures, and the web of communities. Etc, etc.
From the day you were born, your true self is polluted by the noise of external voices that your own inner voice is left unheard or paid less attention to.
What we often think of as our inner voice is nothing but the voice of others as constant mental chatters of a conditioned mind.
We are conditioned, and a conditioned mind is limited.
It cannot know the depths of our soul and it cannot perceive the heights it can soar.
To go beyond the conditioned mind, we need to go beyond the herd mentality and embrace our individuality, honoring it by living an authentic life.
Living an Authentic Life
Living an authentic life or being authentic means, you are true to yourself and you live by your truth, you are loyal to your values, your spirit, and your inner voice regardless of the pressure and force that you are constantly under living in a society.
- It is about living in alignment with your individuality, and your uniqueness, it’s honouring your genuine interests, passions, and your inner talents, the things you are born to do and be.
- It’s dreaming and going forward to design a life that is personally meaningful to you.
- It is finding happiness, not in pleasing others, but in being yourself and making choices that are in your highest good and best interest.
- It is about living in a way that resonates with who you are at a deeper level.
Rather than trying to fit into predetermined ideals imposed upon us by others, we live freely as our hearts guide us in creativity and spontaneity.
By conforming to societal norms, we are suppressing our unique qualities, resulting in a lack of fulfilment and meaning. It’s a straight road to depression.
Many individuals, in order to fit in, sideline their dreams and aspirations, their true longings stem from their hearts, suppress their true nature, talents, and passions, they suppress their individuality, and mold themselves into a version that is expected of them.
But I consider conformity as a Sin.
It’s a sin against our very essence. It’s a betrayal, a disrespect to the soul that yearns for authentic expression.
We cheat ourselves when we trade our authenticity for external approval and validation, and in doing so, we lose ourselves.
We dull our Soul by living according to the expectations of society, instead of aligning with our authentic selves.
It diminishes our uniqueness, turning us into mere second-hand human beings, we live a low-quality life.
But, every step we take in the direction of our authentic self is a step towards our true calling and a meaningful life of genuine contentment, we step towards an Inspired destiny of our soul.
Living in alignment with our authentic self is challenging yet liberating.
It’s a life where every action resonates with truth, every decision stems from self-awareness, and every moment is lived with depth. The beauty of such a life is unparalleled. It’s a life of integrity, where external actions mirror your internal Truth.
We must walk our own path. It often involves making choices that honour our inner calling even if it means diverging from the commonly accepted routes, it means challenging norms and standards that society has set up for us to fit in and start living by our own set of principles and values with integrity.
Rediscovering Our True Self
The path to breaking free from the shackles begins with an individual quest to rediscover our true selves.
We must peel away the layers of conditioning imposed and programmed by society in our minds, silencing the voice of external influences by listening wholeheartedly and very carefully to the whispers of our inner self.
This is a process of unlearning and questioning.
It requires us to question the beliefs, ideas, and values we have adopted because they were expected of us, not because they resonate with our core being.
When we question them, they often lose their meaning, they wither away from our minds. By challenging our assumptions and our conditioned minds, we begin to go beyond them and find who we really are, and what is our real yearnings.
Question societal norms. Just because something has always been done a certain way doesn’t mean it is the right way or the right way for you.
Self-reflect. Spend some time alone, away from the noise of the world.
Now, I am not saying you need to go to the Desert or any cave or forest. But make some time for being alone in your solitude, perhaps in your own room.
Dive deep into your thoughts, fears, and desires. Meditate, Journal, and Understand what makes you, You.
Seek and find the origin of your thoughts, desires, ideas, wishes, dreams, and goals. Find out why you pursue them. What is the origin of all that?
Ask “why” multiple times.
Is the origin of all that coming from a place of conformity to the norm?
or an expression of your inner callings? of your authentic self?
Define your personal values and priorities. Determine what principles guide your life and what you stand for. Clarifying your values will help you make decisions that are in harmony with your true self.
You don’t have to please others. Surround yourself with people who value you for who you truly are, not for the character you are playing to please everyone.
“Tension is who you think you should be, relaxation is who you are “
— Buddhist Saying
Cultivate relationships with those who see, accept, and appreciate your authentic self. True belonging is about being accepted for who you genuinely are.
For that, first, you must authentically be living without any mask in your relationships. Be true to yourself, and others, that requires vulnerability and real strength.
If you do that, you attract the right people into your life.
While it may be challenging initially, you’ll eventually find a group of friends or a community who appreciate and resonate with your authentic self.
Those relationships act as a mirror that reflects your true self and as an anchor grounding you in your authenticity.
The Courage to Be Our True Self
To show up as who we are, speak our truth, and walk our path takes immense courage.
It takes immense courage to stand firm in our values, follow our own path, and embrace our uniqueness despite potential judgments, criticisms, or disapproval.
“To Be Yourself In A World That Is Constantly Trying To Make You Something Else Is The Greatest Accomplishment” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
You may make many mistakes when you make your own way and walk your own path, but nothing gets wasted in the long run, those will be very crucial learning opportunities for you. Every dot will connect.
The journey of self-discovery is ongoing and our authentic selves may evolve over time. Understand that authenticity does not mean a perfect, unchanging state of being but a commitment to living genuinely, day by day.
You have to stay true to your being even when faced with challenges from external judgments and your own internal doubts. It can be frightening and uncertain.
Be brave and trust yourself.
Develop the courage to say no to things that don’t align with who you are inside. It’s okay to decline opportunities, relationships, or obligations that deviate you from your true calling.
You assert your individuality when you say no to things that diminish your authentic self.
Each individual has a unique essence, purpose, and set of qualities that make them different from others.
Each individual has unique talents and potentials and a significant role to play in the evolution of consciousness.
When we embrace our authentic selves and contribute from that place, we contribute to the collective consciousness of human awareness and growth.
You are born to be You and to Bloom.
Every creation is created to be what it is. You are born to be yourself. A flower is effortlessly being itself, and it blooms, you are like that.
You must bloom as an individual.
There is a fragrance in your individuality, in your uniqueness, and in your authenticity.
You are made out of stardust. You are not meant to conform. You are meant to shine as who you are.✨
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